Last week, I admitted a bright and painfully funny 13 year old female with a history of obesity and asthma to our pediatric service for a full body fungal rash that was bacterially superinfected. She needed constant skin care, but we were able to do that for her, and she improved quickly. Until… until she developed NEW abscesses in her groin and armpit for which we had very little explanation. She didn’t need an explanation though. The sores were terribly painful and that was her reality. She was started on different antibiotics and was seen by our surgical team so she could have the wounds drained in the operating room under anesthesia. At the request of the surgeon, she was allowed to only have clear liquids the day before surgery and then no food or drink for the morning of the procedure.
It was all status quo. Except… except that not once did she act upset. Never once was I on the receiving end of teenage attitude. For not a moment did the mother act annoyed with me or my team for making her daughter “hangry”. Their politeness and gratitude endured despite my serial exams of the girl’s very tender sores and despite me not letting her eat for nearly a day and a half. I thanked her. Then, I praised her mother for raising such a patient young woman. I commented that I haven’t met many teenagers who didn’t complain about not being able to eat for 36 hours. The girl said proudly, “It’s not as bad as that one time we all starved ourselves for a week.” Mom chuckled. I was intrigued and asked what made them all starve themselves for a week. “We didn’t have any money.”
I felt defeated. We had seemingly done so much to help this young girl. But in comparison to all she needed, I stood no chance. I had to fight every urge not to give mother my cell number and tell her to call me if that EVER happened again. Before I could slow the twenty simultaneous thoughts on how else I could help, I was shaken by their laughter. They giggled as they took turns telling the story: how they rationed the rice, how often they checked the bank account. I sat to listen. Then, I left dumbfounded and with only a hanging head and a prayer.
Lord help me:
- Look past what people look like. Even those who seem full can be starving.
- Laugh (or at least smile) even as I struggle.
- Have half the patience and grace of this young woman.
Enough For Me 